This is a rare moment (being photographed as a normal human being) and I’d like to share it with you guys LOLThank you Marga for taking this photo! This was during DOSE: UP Underground Music Community 12th Anniv Concert.
It’s weird looking at myself and feeling (and acknowledging?) the detachment from the person in the photo. It’s kind of like an out of body experience I guess; a weird sense of unfamiliarity.
I found myself thinking at first, “really? that’s me?” *cringe* :))

This is a rare moment (being photographed as a normal human being) and I’d like to share it with you guys LOL

Thank you Marga for taking this photo! This was during DOSE: UP Underground Music Community 12th Anniv Concert.

It’s weird looking at myself and feeling (and acknowledging?) the detachment from the person in the photo. It’s kind of like an out of body experience I guess; a weird sense of unfamiliarity.

I found myself thinking at first, “really? that’s me?” *cringe* :))

Initially, I wasn’t too fond of this song.

This is the new music video from Stars; for their song “From The Night”. When I first listened to it I just heard the party tunes and not the things that made me fall in love with them. Taking a second pass at the song, (with video) I notice the small intricacies that the song bringsย TO ME:

1. The night is lonely - Expressed greatly with how the verses are produced - minimal instrumentation and not high energy (sort of reminds you how it is in the wee hours of the night)

2. “I don’t care if we never come back from the night” - It’s okay to feel lonely as long as you have people who feel the same way (Let’s be alone together! lol)ย 

3. I love that the chorus is high energy - sort of shows that it’s okay to have all our personal demons and shit and still be okay. It’s kind of sharing your feelings during the verses to other people (during the chorus).ย 

4. You can party and have fun and still feel alone - There’s a hint of emptiness that this song brings that I can’t fully categorize it just as a party tune.

Ala-Stress Musings

It’s 3 am and I’m supposed to be asleep right now, but I stumbled upon information that made my heart heavy. I had to dig deeper and search for answers.

I first saw a photo; followed by a short description. I quickly learned that it was sort of a memoir for their “person”. It made my heart hurt but at the same time I admired the girl’s optimism. She was thankful for their good times. She remembered what it was like to be loved and inspired by him. I seriously can’t imagine the strength needed to do that. Even from where I am, being a complete stranger, this loss of a beautiful, genuine, and promising life brings me close to tears.ย 

Something made me want to learn more about him. How he died, and how this whole untimely thing came about. I searched and I searched but nothing elaborate came up. All I encountered were words and recollections of peoples’ best times with him. How he was gonna change the industry and how he was on a path to greatness were the “median” messages; how he shared his knowledge of his craft and how he was kind to everyone.ย 

After a couple of minutes and possible emotional exhaustion (I couldn’t reconcile the feeling of being hurt with the passing of a total stranger I have never even met or heard of until now), I gave up on searching for answers. Eventually I thought that it’s better to be remembered with all these kind words and not a generic and detached news headline.

I rarely write like this but I thought that it would be best if I put it out there so that I could detach myself from it and have an objective perspective. It affected me greatly because I value being alive. I’ve struggled with a lot of things (and still do) and I can really say that the best part about my life is that I am alive. I am so fortunate that I have a chance to love, be kind, make music, touch people’s lives, and most importantly, be happy. I have a chance. And I guess, in the greater scheme of things, that is really all that I need.